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Tear You Apart, by Megan Hart
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Their passion will consume everything—and everyone— in its path….
I'm on a train.
I don't know which stop I got on at; I only know the train is going fast and the world outside becomes a blur. I should get off, but I don't. The universe is playing a cosmic joke on me. Here I had my life—a good life with everything a woman could want—and suddenly, there is something more I didn't know I could have. A chance for me to be satisfied and content and maybe even on occasion deliriously, amazingly, exuberantly fulfilled.
So this is where I am, on a train that's out of control, and I am not just a passenger. I'm the one shoveling the furnace full of coal to keep it going fast and faster.
If I could make myself believe it all happened by chance and I couldn't help it, that I've been swept away, that it's not my fault, that it's fate…would that be easier? The truth is, I didn't know I was looking for this until I found Will, but I must've been, all this time. And now it is not random, it is not fate, it is not being swept away.
This is my choice. And I don't know how to stop.
Or even if I want to.
- Sales Rank: #1053977 in Books
- Brand: Brand: Harlequin MIRA
- Published on: 2013
- Released on: 2013-08-27
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.23" h x .81" w x 5.36" l, .50 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 304 pages
- Used Book in Good Condition
Most helpful customer reviews
21 of 23 people found the following review helpful.
The Review This Book Doesn't Deserve
By Ash Wednesday Lee
★★★★★
4.5 STARS
The kindest thing you can do for someone you love is to never tell them how much they have broken your heart.
I don't think I've ever NOT wanted to review a book as much as this.
I feel vastly inept and out of my depth to give any opinion of merit about this one. There will be other readers who'd be more eloquent on this subject matter. Readers I'm hell bent to find and force to give this story better justice than I ever can. But for the moment, just be aware that I'm wincing over the words I'm laying to paper because I feel very much like a poser reviewing this book.
Because I have never been married and this is about a forty-five year old woman cheating on her husband of twenty-two years.
I do not condone infidelity but cheating in books has never been a deal breaker for me, so long as the argument for committing it will have enough weight and sense. Because these issues, when given the proper treatment, are never really as simple as yes and no, good and bad. And this one made all the right arguments and asked all the right questions for me to sympathize with the heroine. Because for me she was a good mother, a good friend and until that fateful day when she woke up from the dream that was her life, she was a good wife. One that makes me yearn for that overrated happiness for her, despite her shortcomings.
Happiness is overrated. Maybe we are not built for it. Maybe the best we can hope for is to be... Content. To be resigned. To muddle through life and be grateful for the good, and work through the bad. Maybe that is what I will have for the rest of my life, this good life to which I am resigned, to which I am grateful.
This was unrelentingly gritty and unapologetic in its honesty, vividly painting marital dystopia. The gruesome details of what lays beyond "til death do us part" brought in sharp focus. Infidelity doesn't come arbitrarily here, it is borne from the staleness routine brings. The slow painful death of romance giving way to dirty dishes in the sink, arguments over laundry, the dripping faucet and the ugliness comfort and complacency ushers to the bedroom and beyond.
It's like a cautionary tale for the newly engaged and a horror story for the newlyweds.
I was pleasantly surprised with the conventions this story bucked. I liked that Elisabeth and Will are both in their forties, old enough to recognize the error and gravity of their actions. I find it interesting that between the two of them, Will was the reluctant participant, the one who doesn't want to be THAT man, the one who breaks up a family, instead settling to be the OTHER man, the one who sleeps with a married woman in secret (a debatable lesser or greater evil, surely). But what I truly appreciated was that they are not just two people willfully committing adultery, they are two fully formed characters that make you ache for them when they are together as much as when they are apart.
"Everyday," I tell him, "you will miss me either a little less or a little more. Until one day you will wake up and realize, you don't miss me at all, or you will find yourself incapable of living without me."
"And then what," Will says. "Then what?"
"Then," I say just before I disconnect, "come and find me."
Elisabeth will probably not be as easy to take for some but for me, she was a very effective heroine. I was never against her. With all the questionable morals of her decisions and seemingly selfish nature of her actions, she was still more a casualty than the actual villain.
***Insert the devastating entirety of Chapter 36 here.***
For all her complexity as a mother, a wife, a lover, a friend, she is consistent in her admirable depth and spine that could only be forged from enduring a marriage that has been waiting to be broken for twenty-two years. She carries the baggage and guilt of her sins on her own, not because she's untrusting, but because she doesn't want to impose the discomfort of her secrets on the people she loves.
This is my first Megan Hart book and I'm thrilled to see she pulls no punches when it comes to simple words strung beautifully in quiet and heavy harmony. The metaphors did get a bit too in-your-face but everywhere else, her words reach across the pages, yanking at those near non-existent heartstrings of mine while I could only read on helplessly.
Some details still didn't add up for me, like Naveen's purpose in the story and Elisabeth's Synesthesia. Was it an excuse for the psychedelic narrative of voices having colors and lights having tastes without coming across pretentious? Was it to best illustrate her long-standing isolation that may have doomed her marriage even before it started? It was an odd piece to the puzzle. Though the last 20% did well in digging its claws deep, I felt the heartbreaking goodbye was a little too drawn out for my tastes.
Impossible as it may seem, with the kind of story this delivered, I liked how things ended. And I know, I'd probably be alone in that boat.
This got a little too long, I'd perfectly understand if anyone who comes across this review TL:DR'ed this. And I apologize for what I feel are my poor efforts to approximate my feelings towards this story but I fervently encourage everyone to read this book and write a better review.
One that this book better deserves.
"It will only hurt at first. Only for a while. Eventually, it will all be okay."
✦✦✦ARC provided by the publishers thru NG in exchange for an unbiased review.✦✦✦
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful.
Holy!! Intense and heartbreaking!
By Pormmom
http://ripeforreader.blogspot.ca/2013/08/tear-you-apart-by-megan-hart.html
I first want to explain the 3 STARS...... As you will be able to see from my review, the story itself left me feeling somewhat unsatisfied, but there is no way for me to deny the absolute superior way in which Megan Hart is able to use words. The quality of writing is superb, and for that alone I would have handed out 5 stars.........but the review is more than just the quality of the writing, hence my compromise.
REVIEW:
Elisabeth's life has turned to muted colours, having lost most of its vibrancy in the course of her twenty plus years of marriage. She not unhappy exactly, more content, or better yet complacent.
Then she meets Will, an artist whose work is displayed at the gallery where she works. He has a way of helping her see the vividness of the world around her again. Colours, sensations, fragrances all come back to life, interchangeable, as they always were before for Elisabeth.
But with that comes the realization that her life as it had been, was bland and numbing.....soulless. Slowly things that were insignificant annoyances before, become major irritants and it becomes more difficult to continue to pretend to be unaffected when she craves so much more.
Elisabeth is coming into her own.......and of her own. But why does choosing for herself have to mean hurting someone else?
****
Holy!! Intense and heartbreaking!
In all honesty, this story, however recognizable, left me feeling wrenched and rather sad and achy. I had really counted on a more hopeful resolution, understanding Elisabeth's plight so well and of course, drawing parallels to what I know. But perhaps in looking for my own answers, I found I was left disillusioned and empty. Maybe the struggle hit too close to home??
There are some things I just don't understand. Why, after struggling to keep everything together until her family is settled and then finally working up the courage to choose for herself, can't Elisabeth choose all the way and be with the one she wants and who wants her. And what is this ongoing dynamic between Elisabeth and Naveen, the gallery owner and her long-time friend?
The final moments in the book were so long expected that the end was very anti-climactic and rather inconclusive on the whole. Here Elisabeth is, struggling the entire story in coming to a certain decision about her life, that involves other people, and when she finally makes the decision, there is no further input or consequence described or discussed, as if all the other characters in the book have suddenly disappeared. I know the story is about Elisabeth, but decisions she makes have a ripple effect, the ripple effect reflects back on her, but none of that is visible.
I know that the book is considered erotic and I would agree with that description, however, I would have to say that the emotional complexities over whelmed the sexual aspects of the story to such a degree, that the erotic component became secondary to me. (However beautifully descriptive!)
Lastly, I'm a firm believer in going after what you want with all you have, and this story just doesn't resonate that for me. Elisabeth was complacent, stayed complacent and chooses to continue to be complacent, albeit in a different set of circumstances.
It is impossible to ignore the writing by Megan Hart, it is of such high quality. She is able to bring the characters to life and create tension with mere words and suggestions that are tangible. Nothing is 'over'-described, words are used in a very artful manner, not to blatantly outline, but to subtly hint and in that, Ms. Hart is unique.
An artfully written story that demands a strong emotional involvement!!
**ARC courtesy of NetGalley and Harlequin MIRA in return for an honest review.**
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
4.5 stars
By Jen Literary Gossip
At some point in this book I was either angry, turned on, or so upset I yelled at my husband. It was midnight, he was already sleeping, and I had finished Tear You Apart. I sat there for a while, just absorbing the ending and then, BAM, the anger hit. After everything, that's how it ends? I was so emotionally gutted that I yelled at him which turned into tears of anger. Then, I made him listen while I recapped the story so he would understand why I was just so upset. I'm pretty sure he thinks I've lost my mind. I kind of felt like I was losing it, with all the angry crying I was doing. The more I thought about it, the more I was just gutted by the end. It took me forever to fall asleep because all I could do was relive the the whole damn book. I woke up the next morning still feeling raw, but I had a slightly different outlook on the ending after getting to sleep on it. I think this book is going to cause some serious emotional responses in readers.
From the time I read the books description, I was intrigued. I liked the way it was written, straight from the main characters thoughts. That's how the whole book is written and it allows the reader to feel like they are in the story, experiencing the highest highs and the lowest lows. Elisabeth doesn't experience the world like everyone else does, literally. Elizabeth has synesthesia (which is real, I looked it up!), which is a neurological disorder. When she hears a voice, it smells to her. When she experiences certain feelings, it can make her see colors. It's wild and unique to have that in a book, and I will say that I found myself picturing in detail what Elisabeth was seeing and smelling. It heightened the emotional connection I shared with the main character. It was one of my favorite parts of this story.
I loved that Megan Hart wrote these characters as mid-40's adults. No whiney adolescents, no macho bad boys, and I want to give Megan a high 5 for writing smart, intelligent characters. Elisabeth is a 45 year old woman, who is married, lonely, and feels underappreciated. Then she meets Will. Normally, I can't stand these kinds of affair stories. Hasn't the adultery storyline already been killed to death? Apparently not, because I was sucked in from page 1 and never once thought about not finishing it. Elisabeth's journey from start to finish is a rocky road. I wanted to scream at her to get her crap together and fix things, and then her husband would act like such a jackass that it made me want Elisabeth to leave. I felt like I was hanging on to the middle of a tug-of-war rope, being pulled in different directions and the end of the game wasn't in sight.
I felt bad for Will, but he knows what he's getting into from the moment they meet. He's an adult. He made the decision. So when he starts pulling his crappy stunts I feel like kicking him but then, what's the guy supposed to do? How long does someone wait? I don't know the answer to that question but I know that Will must feel like he's hanging from the same tug-of-war rope that I was.
And then we have the ending. It wasn't what I was expecting. It wasn't easy to see happen. I think that sometimes we get what we deserve and Karma can be a bitch. I'm just not sure Elisabeth deserved what she got. I may not agree with the ending, but the author made me angry cry (is this even a current book term??), so she's definitely doing something right!
My rating: 4.5 emotional, sexy, and gripping Stars
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